Nov 16, 2009

It Happens And Its Okay

Everyone knows…
If a bird craps on you at the beach–its good luck
AND
If it rains on your wedding day–its good luck

But I never bought this idea of icky good luck. The reality is…this is NOT good luck. If a bird craps on you at the beach– its gross, slimy and down-right uncomfortable. If it rains on your wedding day– its gloomy, wet and inconvenient. That’s the reality. That’s the truth and the reason why we make up these little white lies that make us feel better.

So what about the saying “Failure is the mother of success” Is this just another socially acceptable white lie that we use to make ourselves feel better? I’m not sure…so I did what everyone in 2009 does…I “google-ed” it. :) Google lead me to UsingEnglish.com.

UsingEnglish.com calls this an expression an idiom– “a peculiar kind of speech that has a double meaning.” UsingEnglish.com is correct, this is definitely peculiar. If failure is the mother of success, then this “family” is practicing tough love. This child (success) will undoubtedly and definitely be seeking counseling for Mommy issues.

But tough love is a reality. Tough love is not winning every game or always coming out on top. Tough love is the “real world.” (Insert depression music) Dun Dun Dun……

The REAL WORLD, not be confused with the ever popular MTV show. No, not that real world. I’m talking about the REAL “real world.” You know, that smug response, “welcome to the real world kid.” The one that people refer to when you’ve lucked out, lost or failed.

But wait you ask...what about that quote that says “Failure is not an option?” Well, the sad truth is, that quote left a part out. Although failure may not be an option… it is inevitable. People are imperfect and in the not-so-pleasant “real world,” at some point were going to fail. In order to be successful you have to fail…it’s the truth that is omitted when you are encouraged to “follow your dreams.”

Saying “follow your dreams” is much more inspirational than the truth. The truth is scary and unpleasant. Just coming out and saying,

“strap your seat belts on kids, the road ahead is littered with multiple disappointments, heartache, hard work, occasional self doubt and some well deserved pity parties...all on the quest to achieve your dreams.”

No one tells you that. Instead we cut out the middle, which makes for a much more optimistic approach- thus “Follow your dreams.”

And for those of us who have heard the less popular expression “Failure is the mother of success,” we know that this is true. This is not some silly saying about bird crap and soggy weddings. Instead it’s the truth.

But do not be alarmed…there is another truth, another secret that no one is sharing. That is that it’s okay to fail at some thing. (Take note of the word SOMETHING.) I want to reiterate that it is NOT okay to fail at everything. We have to be participating members of society. But failing at some things is okay. Failing at some things is natural. It’s how we discover our strengths and weakness’s. It’s how we discover what we like to do, what comes natural and what we have to work at.

Failure really is the mother of success. To be successful we have to weed out what were unsuccessful at. So let’s just leave the silly bull-shit one liners out of it, and accept the truth that failure really isn’t so scary. Were going to mess up, were going to fail at something at some point. It’s inevitable and its okay.

SHORT AND SWEET...AKA...MORAL OF THE BLOG
You cannot be good at everything, and you will not be good at everything. Everything will not be perfect because this is not a fairy tale...its life. This realization should not be scary but comforting. So lets just chill out and accept the inevitable. Shit happens and failure happens....and Its all okay. :)

xoxo
Lana

"Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail" -Ralph Waldo Emerson

3 comments:

  1. Dolores Schorr11/17/09, 7:35 AM

    I love your Blog. You truly are a great writer. You keep me so interested. I cannot wait for your next post.

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  2. Tonight in class I had a realization that seems to fit with this blog (and previous ones). Here is my theory: For us, this fixation with SUCCESS and working ourselves to death to achieve it started at Padua. Generally, girls in high school are feeling the pressure to "impress the boys" or make the cheer leading squad or whatever. We were feeling the pressure to build up our transcripts to prepare for college. Thoughts??

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  3. Hey, I have been reading this since I saw it posted and I love it...and to Jeni who wrote above me...ABSOLUTELY...I went through it and so did all my sisters. I would love to read a post about that!

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xoxo
Lana